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Giveaway!!! Top 5 Submitted Jokes Win A Hot Theme!

Things have been a little bit slow in the BlackBerry world so we decided to spice things up by teaming up with John of GadgetBean to giveaway 5 copies of the gorgeous iBerry Blocks Custom L Theme. This theme is no longer available for purchase so this is your last chance! The theme is only compatible with the BlackBerry 8300 & 8800 series devices running OS 4.2.1 or 4.2.2.

All you have to do is submit your favorite joke or story as a comment to this post. We have mentioned JC’s work quite a few times in the past since he makes some pretty slick themes. You can check out our review of iBerry Blocks Custom L theme at this link.

Check out the gorgeous “iBerry Blocks Custom L” theme below and make sure to check out some of JC’s other slick designs available in the BerryReview Store. They are all 20% off until February 29th using the following instructions.

Iberryblocks_iberryblocks21Iberryblocks_iberryblocks34

Hopefully this will bring a few laughs to the table! Submit your favorite joke or story and the top 5 submissions win this theme. Try to be original and you get extra points if it is BlackBerry related!

Giveaway Rules:

  • Submit your best joke or story as a comment to THIS post using the form below to enter the giveaway
  • Keep in mind the iBerry Blocks Custom L theme is only compatible with 8300 and 8800 series devices running OS 4.2.1 or 4.2.2
  • Multiple submissions per reader are allowed BUT only the best one will be considered
  • The top 5 jokes will be judged by BerryReview and will be totally objective and based on multiple “scientific factors”
  • Submissions will be closed on February 12th 2008 at 1PM EST
  • Winners will be announced on February 13th 2008 and we will publish their submissions
  • If all goes to hell in a hand basket we reserve the right to substitute the prize or close the giveaway. (or take away your lollypop)
13 total comments on this postSubmit your comment!
  1. The value of a
    Catholic education and a #2 pencil

    Little Susie was not the best student
    in Catholic School . Usually she slept through the class.

    One day
    her teacher, a Nun, called on her while she was
    sleeping.

    “Tell me Susie, who created the universe?”

    When Susie didn’t stir, little Johnny who was her friend sitting
    behind her, took his pencil and jabbed her in the rear.

    “God Almighty!” shouted Susie.

    The Nun said, “Very good” and continued teaching her class.

    A little later the Nun asked Susie, “Who is our Lord and Savior?”

    But Susie didn’t stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to
    her rescue and stuck her in the butt.

    “Jesus Christ!!!” shouted Susie.

    And the Nun once again said, “Very good,” and Susie fell back
    asleep.

    The Nun asked her a third question…”What did Eve say to
    Adam after she had her twenty-third child?”

    Again, Johnny came to the rescue. This time Susie jumped up and
    shouted, “If you stick that damn thing in me one more time, I’ll
    break it in half!”

    The nun fainted…………

  2. What’s the most asked question to Chelsea Clinton?

    Who are you voting for, your Mama or Obama?

  3. Two Irishmen, Patrick and Michael, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning freighter. While rummaging through the boat’s provisions, Patrick stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of Patrick, a genie came forth. This particular genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three.Without giving much thought to the matter, Patrick blurted out, ‘Make the entire ocean Guinness beer!’ The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into rich, black porter. Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of Guinness on the hull broke the stillness, as the two men considered their predicament. Michael looked disgustedly at Patrick, whose wish had obviously been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment, he blurted, ‘Nice going Patrick! Now we’re going to have to piss in the boat!’

  4. A Professional Gambler
    During the Great Depression, there was a man who walked into a bar one day. He went up to the bartender and said, “Bartender, I’d like to buy the house a round of drinks.”

    The bartender said, “That’s fine, but we’re in the middle of the Depression, so I’ll need to see some money first.”

    The guy pulled out a huge wad of bills and set them on the bar. The bartender can’t believe what he’s seeing. “Where did you get all that money?” asked the bartender.

    “I’m a professional gambler,” replied the man.

    The bartender said, “There’s no such thing! I mean, your odds are fifty-fifty at best, right?”

    “Well, I only bet on sure things,” said the guy.

    “Like what?” asked the bartender.

    “Well, for example, I’ll bet you fifty dollars that I can bite my right eye,” he said.

    The bartender thought about it. “Okay,” he said.

    So, the guy pulled out his false right eye and bit it. “Aw, you screwed me,” said the bartender, and paid the guy his $50.

    “I’ll give you another chance. I’ll bet you another fifty dollars that I can bite my left eye,” said the stranger.

    The bartender thought again and said, “Well, I know you’re not blind, I mean, I watched you walk in here. I’ll take that bet.” So, the guy pulled out his false teeth and bit his left eye.

    “Aw, you screwed me again!” protested the bartender.

    “That’s how I win so much money, bartender. I’ll just take a bottle of your best scotch in lieu of the fifty dollars,” said the man.

    With that, the guy went to the back room and spent the better part of the night playing cards with some of the locals. After many hours of drinking and card playing, he stumbled up to the bar. Drunk as a skunk, he said, “Bartender, I’ll give you one last chance. I’ll bet you five hundred dollars that I can stand on this bar on one foot and piss into that whiskey bottle on that shelf behind you without spilling a drop.”

    The bartender once again pondered the bet. The guy couldn’t even stand up straight on two feet, much less one. “Okay, you’re on,” he said.

    The guy climbed up on the bar, stood on one leg, and began pissing all over the place. He hit the bar, the bartender, himself, but not a drop made it into the whiskey bottle.

    The bartender was ecstatic. Laughing, the bartender said, “Hey pal, you owe me five hundred dollars!”

    The guy climbed down off the bar and said, “That’s okay. I just bet each of the guys in the card room a thousand bucks each that I could piss all over you and the bar and still make you laugh!”

  5. OK, This one only a select few people may get…just think blackberry outages…If you dont get it, google RIM NOC lol

    NOC NOC

    Who’s there?

    ………………

  6. The Shepherd and the Yuppie

    A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of the dust cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Broni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the shepherd, “If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock, will you give me one?” The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his peacefully grazing flock and calmly answered, “Sure.”

    The yuppie parked his car, whipped out his notebook and connected it to a cell phone, then he surfed to a NASA page on the internet where he called up a GPS satellite navigation system, scanned the area, and then opened up a database and an Excel spreadsheet with complex formulas. He sent an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response. Finally, he prints out a 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized printer then turns to the shepherd and says, “You have exactly 1586 sheep.” “That is correct; take one of the sheep.” said the shepherd. He watches the young man select one of the animals and bundles it into his car.

    Then the shepherd says: ” If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my sheep?” “OK, why not.” answered the young man. “Clearly, you are a consultant.” said the shepherd. “That’s correct,” says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?” ” Well” answers the shepherd. “You turned up here although nobody called you. You want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked, and you know nothing about my business.

    Now give me back my dog.”

  7. A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all its navigation and communications equipment. With all the clouds and haze, the pilot couldn’t determine his position or how to get to the airport. But he saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, drew a handwritten sign, and held it up. The sign read, “WHERE AM I?”People in the building quickly responded with their own sign: “YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER.”The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, plotted the course to the airport and landed safely. On the ground, the co-pilot asked him how their sign helped determine the helicopter’s position.”I knew that had to be the Microsoft building,” the pilot said, “because they gave me a technically correct, but completely useless answer.”

  8. “Nobody reads books anymore.” (canned laughter)
    .
    Sorry, held it in for hours. Couldn’t resist eventually.

  9. What do you get when you eat a Blackberry? A BlueTooth.

  10. Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go on a camping trip. After a good dinner, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
    Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

    “I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” exclaims Watson.

    “And what do you deduce from that?”

    Watson ponders for a minute.

    “Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?”

    Holmes is silent for a moment. “Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”

  11. Got quite a few laughs so far. I loved the guinness and professional gambler ones.

    I will add one myself. Don’t take this as my political opinion. I truly do not have one:

    Bill Clinton is out jogging, and he encounters a man with some puppies. Clinton asks the man what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, “They’re Democrat puppies, Mr. President.” Clinton thinks that is so great that the next day he brings Hillary to see these puppies for herself. He asks the man to tell Hillary what kind of puppies they are, and the man responds, “They’re Republican puppies.” The president looks puzzled and says, “Yesterday, you told me they were Democrat puppies.” The man smiles and says, “Yesterday, they were. But today, they have their eyes open!”

  12. The Farmer’s Daughters

    A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were getting ready to go out on dates. The first beau came to the door and said, “I’m Eddie and I’m here to pick up Betty. We’re going for spaghetti. Is she ready?”

    “No,” the farmer said.

    The second beau came to the door and said, “I’m Joe and I’m here to pick up Flo to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?”

    “No,” the farmer barked.

    The third beau came to the door and said to the farmer: “Hello, my name is Chuck-”

    The farmer shot Chuck.

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